And that’s how you freak me out…

Posted by on Feb 16, 2016 in Life After Phoenix, Update | 2 Comments

TRIGGER WARNING! CONTENT MIGHT NOT BE SUITABLE FOR SOME GRIEVING PARENTS CONTAINS POSSIBLE TRIGGERS   **************************************************************************************************************************************   Last night, as I was checking on Little Brother, I went into his room as usual, but he didn’t stir. Okay, not unusual, he can sleep soundly at times. I placed my hand on his tummy. Nothing and […]

Little Brother is 19 months old!

Posted by on Feb 11, 2016 in Life After Phoenix, Update | 2 Comments

Little Brother is 19 months old as of last Monday! I. Can’t. Even. Honestly, I started freaking out about this ( huge) milestone January 1st. As a result I am pretty sure I gave myself 7 migraines in 5 weeks. I know that the chance of me losing another child is slim, but God has […]

Longer without you

Dear Phoenix, A few weeks ago marked 19 months since you passed. We have now entered a time I have been dreading – more time without you than with you. I only had 19 short months with you. It often seems so unfair that our time was cut short. The pain is unescapable. The pain of […]


Posted by on Dec 7, 2015 in Life After Phoenix | No Comments

This was always my favorite time of year. I loved fall/winter – they are my season. And, while I still prefer these seasons over spring and summer (way too hot) I am not the biggest fan of the winter holidays anymore. I figured last year was because it was my first everything without Phoenix and I sure […]

Happy 3rd Birthday Phoenix!

Posted by on Oct 6, 2015 in Dear Phoenix, Life After Phoenix | No Comments

Dear Phoenix, Today you turned 3! But, you were not here to celebrate with us. Daddy and I stayed up still the time you were born last night. We talked about my labor and your birth. 20 hours of labor and a c-section!!!!  We tried to figure out what you might like to eat now. […]


Posted by on Jun 1, 2015 in Life After Phoenix | No Comments

This blog post will be more or less whatever pops in by mind. You have been warned. Wow, it has been a year. That is hard to believe. I survived a year without Phoenix; if that is what you want to call it. Surviving. Huh, honestly, I have days that I am what I call […]

Phoenix Roanne

Posted by on May 17, 2015 in Life After Phoenix | One Comment

Updated – 5-18-15 I can’t believe a nearly a year has gone by without Phoenix. There have been a lot of requests on how to help on May 21st. After some thought, Luke and I decided to ask that you do random acts of kindness on the 21st. Phoenix was an extremely happy baby, and we […]

One of those days

Posted by on Apr 6, 2015 in Life After Phoenix | One Comment

I am having one of those days. Where all I want to do is lay on the couch and be sad. Watch Netflix. Have someone bring me an Oreo Cheesecake milkshake. Scratch the milkshake. I used to share my milkshakes with Phoenix and it would be too sad to drink one now. Oh, and by […]

March 27th, 2015

Posted by on Mar 27, 2015 in Life After Phoenix | No Comments

Last night Luke, Little Brother and I went out for dinner. While we were waiting for our food I look over to my left and there is this most beautiful little girl with Down Syndrome. She had this sprout of a pony tail on top of her head that was simply adorable. She had a […]

10 Months

Posted by on Mar 21, 2015 in Life After Phoenix | One Comment

Today marks 10 months that I lost Phoenix. 10 horrible months. So here are 10 things I miss. 1. Her Crazy Hair 2. Her Laugh 3. Her Kisses 4. Her Personality 5. Her Curiosity 6. Her Smile 7. Her Loathing of Medical Staff 8. Her Fingers and Toes 9. Her Love of Others 10. Phoenix