The Gift Bag
I was told to bring an outfit for you. One final outfit. Your cute white dress with flowers. I loved that dress. It reminded me of spring And childhood. A pretty little pink bow for your hair. Your beautiful hair. An amber neckless. Bracelets. Lots of bracelets. Can’t forget your bracelets. You were a girl […]
Phoenix is gone
Can’t sleep. Body aches. Heart is broken, Phoenix is gone. I never asked for this. People are unknowingly cruel. And, Phoenix is gone. Sounds, smells and even tastes are mean. A reminder of what has been and what is. Phoenix is gone. Forget this. I hate this. Phoenix is gone. I want to scream, “you […]
Pain
The pain in my chest is there because you are not here. The ache is so intense that it physically hurts. Today it is sharp. Yesterday it was dull. What will tomorrow bring? There is silence. It hurts my ears. My arms ache from not holding you. I yearn for sweet baby smell. My lips […]
To Honor You
This poem was read at the first Compassonate Friends meetings that Luke and I went to. To Honor You To honor you, I get up everyday and take a breath. and start another day without you. To honor you, I laugh and love with those who knew your smile And the way your eyes twinkled with […]
A Child Of Mine
One of Luke’s co-workers gave Luke this poem after Phoenix died. He recieved it when his son passed away. A Child of Mine -Edgar Guest I will lend you, for a little time, A child of mine, He said. For you to love the while she lives. And mourn for when she’s dead. It may […]
New Land
When Phoenix was born somebody gave us this poem, “Welcome to Holland.” In the beginning it helped calm some of the fear. Yes, we were sad that Phoenix was born different. We were scared for her future. As time went on, we did discover the beauty that she brought into our lives. Later, I read […]
How Can I?
Dear Phoenix, How can I keep going without you? How can I cook dinner without shooing you away from the hot oven? How can I do the dishes without you trying to crawl into the dishwasher? How can I eat or drink anything without sharing with you? How can I go to the store without […]
What You May See
You may see the smile on my face. What you can’t see are my nails digging into my palm to keep it there. You may see me going about life. You can’t see the nightmare replaying itself in my head. You may call me strong. I am anything but. You may think of her occasionally. […]
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